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Why Is He So Mean To Me?

So I was in this meeting, and it ran late. And then the electricity went out...and so did the phones...and then this madman with a grenade launcher took me hostage...and he wanted ONE MILLION DOLLARS for my release...but when he was discussing the details with the cops on the phone (they had been reconnect by this point) I gave him a karate chop to the back of the...big toe...which crippled him...but he still was able to fire his grenade launcher so he aimed it at my...belly button...but before he was able to fire...

ALIENS!

And they...ate him. But not me. Because girls aren't as tasty as boys...

So they got on the phone...and said they wanted TWO MILLION DOLLARS for my release...oh, and something about Gerald Ford's medical records...so then I gave them...

ONE MINUTE to get OUT OF MY HAIR!

Cause they were really, really small...but there were a LOT of them...and they were bigger than they were before they ate grenade launcher dude...

So they held a council to discussed my release. They needed a two-thirds majority vote and there was much arguing, bargaining and haggling. I heard one group agree to approve two of the federal court nominees if subspace mini-shuttle manufactures could get a tax break on foreign-made alternators...

Finally they reached a decision and I was allowed to leave...on the condition that I appeal to libertarians everywhere to form an alliance with the Green Party and unite under the long range goal of a peaceful take over by the fir trees.

...Do you believe?


posted by Headless-in-GR @ 6/25/2005 10:50:00 PM


 

Comments:

I think maybe I might.
 
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