On How To Be A Neoorthodoxymoron

1) Be "straight thinking" enough to know it is impossible to bend the spoon.

2) Believe firmly in the truth of Ecclesiastes 1:9.

3) Believe firmly in the truth of Revelation 21:5.

4) Be emerging enough to be catholic.

5) Must emphatically NOT be Emergent, in order to insure actual movement.

6) Fill your house full of brand new distressed furniture.

7) Bliss is perpetually solving the Unsolvable Mystery.

8) Heaven and Hell are worlds apart in exactly the same place - Earth.

9) "The wind blows and you know not where it comes from..." but you actually wonder if it might be the trees of the field clapping their hands - or if it's really the TULIPs.

10) In the same vein as Just Pat and Headless, must be a Bar-thyte. The meaning of which is still quite elusive, however it clearly indicates a penchant for margaritas...

posted by Headless-in-GR @ 6/23/2005 07:52:00 PM